You cannot make another adult choose recovery. You can still make a clear, caring offer of support and decide what you can and cannot continue to do.
Start with a conversation you can actually have.
When someone declines treatment, a family can feel pressure to find the perfect argument. Begin with a specific concern and an invitation to talk. Consider what help you are willing to offer and what decisions remain the other adult’s to make. A professional can help you work through situations involving safety, housing, or complicated family relationships.
Practical starting points
- Choose a calm moment to describe what you have observed without labels or threats.
- Ask open questions and listen for what the person wants or fears.
- Offer specific next steps, such as helping explore counseling or treatment options.
- Set boundaries around your own money, home, safety, and well-being; seek professional guidance when the situation is complex.
A conversation example
An illustrative opening: ‘I care about you. I noticed you missed two commitments we agreed on, and I’m concerned. How are things going from your perspective? Would you be open to talking with someone about support?’ The goal is to invite a conversation; a script cannot guarantee agreement.
Before your next conversation
- Write down two specific observations, without diagnosing the person.
- Choose one concrete offer of help you can realistically provide.
- Identify support you need for yourself, regardless of their response.
Further reading and support
SAMHSA: talking with someone about help →Explore family counseling →
Find free recovery meetings and family support →
Connect With Redwood← All resources